there is no perfect car for every need
AWD cars run in AWD all the time with the electronic system allocating the power to each wheel as needed and thus are great when you find yourself unexpectedly in slippery conditions and is thus primarily a safety system rather than an off-road system. The constant shifting of power between wheels is not ideal for difficult terrain, and most AWD systems aren’t as robust or durable as a 4WD setup in those situations.
Subaru full time AWD powers the centre diff which then powers the front and rear axle so that the rear can get to 70% of the torque if needed.
Many other AWDs power the front axle first which limits the rear axle to a maximum of only 40% of the torque.
“On-demand AWD” such as Toyota Kluger runs in front wheel 2WD by default but automatically changes to AWD as needed and this can give better fuel economy than a full time AWD system
4WDs designed for off road use generally give equal power to each of the wheels in 4WD mode and are typically based upon 4WD utes with truck chassis
4WD is usually on heavy truck chassis vehicles designed for towing or going off road and these generally are in 2WD rear wheel mode for highway use (for less wear and tear, better efficiency, and cornering) and then you can switch to either 4WD High (better traction at higher speeds in slippery conditions such as gravel roads or firm sand) or 4WD LOW gear modes (for soft sand, deep mud, snow, steep terrain, or slow rock crawling). In most 4WDs you can switch from 2H to 4H without stopping, but still have to come to a complete stop to switch from 4H to 4L. 4WD mode should NOT be used on dry bitumen especially on corners - this could be dangerous if power train becomes bound and locks up!
Many 4WD vehicles allow optional or aftermarket locking and limited-slip differentials take the power distribution one step further by sending an equal amount of the axle’s available torque to both wheels. Locking differentials make both wheels spin at the same speed at all times which is helps when traversing rugged or swampy terrain. However a fully locked diff makes them unsuitable for dry-road travel due to binding when turning. Limited slip differentials offer a compromise by automatically providing increased torque distribution when needed – although they stop short of fully “locking” – without affecting on-road driving characteristics.
There are also plenty of aftermarket equipment available for 4WDs – suspension upgrades, snorkels and more – to further boost their off-road capabilities.
if you want to tow vans you probably should go for a diesel 4WD which has plenty of torque
if you live in remote areas or really want to go off-road on rough rocky/steep tracks, you probably should go for a diesel 4WD which has plenty of torque and off-road credentials (ground clearance, good approach/depart angles, truck chassis ruggedness)
eg. Toyota Prado, Ford Everest, Ford Ranger, Mazda BT50, Mitsubishi Pajero
if you only plan to go on relatively easy gravel roads, go for an AWD SUV with reasonable ground clearance because this will give you a MUCH more comfortable and safer drive on highways with lower centre of gravity, and will be easier around town and in shopping centre car parks (esp. those with turning circles less than 11m) as well as being more economical to run in the city